“Don’t fear the enemy that attacks you, but the fake friend that hugs you.”
The world is full of beautiful people, but then again you might notice it is also strangely full of fake people who will stab you in the back unremorsefully. Whether these people are your “friends” or colleagues, it pays to watch out for the masks with two faces who will play games and deceive you.
You could have thousands of friends on Facebook, but how many of them take 5 seconds to send you a message on your birthday? How many of them stick around when life gets ugly?
When I was in my 20s, I had many friends, but I now realise I had many people I knew. And now, I’d rather have one real friend than 1000 fake friends, minus the drama and anxiety that came with them.
So, how can you spot a fake friend?
Well, funny, you should ask! Because I’ve come up with 6 signs that will help you spot a fake friend!
#1. A fake friend will gossip behind your back
“Better to have an enemy who slaps you in the face than a friend who stabs you in the back.”
The feeling of being gossiped about is not nice, but when it’s from a friend, it’s even worse.
What’s even worse is when a person claims to be your friend, and then they gain your trust intending to get information out of you to use against you.
If you also find they are bitching about another friend to you, they will do the same to you.
#2. Drama follows them
“I don’t have time for fake friends anymore. Either be real or be gone.”
Drama and negativity will follow this fake friend everywhere! They will indulge in telling you their drama, and will most likely cry victim and play the blame game caused by the drama they have created.
#3. A fake friend can be narcissistic, self-absorbed and manipulative
“Fake friends: once they stop talking to you, they start talking about you.”
In my own experience, narcissistic, self-absorbed fake friends are the worst! (Trust me, I’ve met plenty while working in the cruise ship and entertainment industry).
Everything is about them. They will do what they please and will likely be only interested in what you’re doing if they can benefit from it.
These fake friends won’t listen like real friends and won’t show interest in knowing you on a deeper level.
Be careful if this egomaniac type of friend starts stroking your ego with cheap flattery, as this is a sign an ulterior motive is lurking around the corner like a shady robber; they are merely prepping you for some toxic manipulation! Run from these types of people, before they rob you of your emotions and precious time.
If this fake friend doesn’t get what they want from you, watch out for passive-aggressive behaviour, as they will make you feel bad for merely setting your boundaries, then watch as the actual colors of a fake friend finally come out. Not cute!
#4. You only hear from a fake friend when they need you
“Some people forget about you until they want something from you.”
Do you seem to be giving more than 50 % in this friendship? Are you continually doing favours and feel like your energy has been sucked dry? Is this friend there for you when you need them?
Or; has a long-lost friend suddenly sent you a friend request, then next minute they are trying to sign you up to their MLM scheme? Or perhaps this “friend” finds out you’re in a position to help advance their career somehow and they try to be your new best friend?
A fake friend will take advantage of you, and use you at their disposal. If you give them an inch, they will take a mile!
I have learned in friendships like these to set clear boundaries and show self-respect because you won’t be getting it from this fake friend. If they don’t mind taking advantage of you, this shows the characteristics of a person with no integrity and honour. My advice would be to say, BUB-BYE!
#5. They get jealous when you’re doing well
“People want to see you do better, but not doing better than them.”-London Mond
Do your friends support your dreams and desires or pull you away from them?
A fake friend will likely be that devil on your shoulder who will want you to make bad decisions. This fake friend will be jealous and won’t want you to be doing better than them. Although this could be their insecurity, no one should have time for a friend who pulls them down.
#6. You can’t be yourself around them
“Watch who you call a friend because friends are the same ones that will leak your business to everyone after yall not friends anymore.” – Ritu Ghatourey
With your real friends, you can be yourself around them without feeling judged or paranoid if you think they will relay some personal information to someone else.
You will find it challenging to be your natural self around them with a fake friend. (go figure!) I have learned that your instinct and gut feeling about someone is a powerful tool and ultimately your best weapon in spotting a fake friend!
Conclusion:
Life is not only full of real friendships but fake ones as well. Regardless of these valuable experiences that we can learn from; if we can help spot the fake friends, then we will be more in control of how we let ourselves be treated.
If someone is stabbing you in the back, they are behind you for a reason. Let this fake friend go, and celebrate as you have lost nothing but a dead weight that was dragging you down.
Ain’t no one got time for that shit!
Thanks for reading How To Spot A Fake Friend! If you have any advice you want to share, please share it in the comment section below, or share this article with your friends on social media. ♥
Emmy is the founder and content writer at woopdedo. With a background in the performing arts, she then had a career working on cruise ships, until she decided to return to NZ where she spends most of her time storytelling and freelance writing. You can contact her on the social media links below or visit the work with us page.
